Sean: Ugh, it’s time for this test tube full of Scope to go.
Jane: No! Not in the sink over the dishes! It’s got urine in it!
Sean: You let Cinder keep a test tube full of urine next to our wine glasses? For how long?
Jane: It’s not full of urine, it only has a little bit of urine in it–it’s mostly mouthwash. And isn’t the point here that I stopped you from pouring it over our dishes, which if you had done, would have had you rushing out to buy new dishes before our next meal?
Sean: You are so my son’s mother.
Yup. To that end, I offer more proof:
Sean: Is this test tube in the sink the urine test tube?
Cinder: I don’t know. There are lot of test tubes in the house. Odds are good someone peed in one of them at some time.
Cinder: Well, ,when I say someone, I mean me. But if it makes you feel better, I don’t remember peeing in any test tubes recently.
Ender: I do!
Sean: I want my own sterilized kitchen. And none of you can ever come in.
Well. This is why I didn’t tell him about The Floor Peas.
First published October 8, 2012, Nothing By The Book
“Jane, why the re-run?”
“A) Funny as all hell, no? B) I’m travelling. Guess where? Guess where? Clues: critical items in the suitcase were good walking shoes, painkillers, and a hot pink bikini. PS Dear clients, also a laptop. Always, the laptop.”