“No, we were just being normal”



Cinder: Um, no, Mom, this is just us being normal. If we were trying to drive you crazy—Flora! Ender! Come how Mom what it would be like if we were trying to drive Mom crazy on purpose!

Flora: Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.

Ender: I pooped my pants. And you can’t clean my bum. I pooped my pants. And you can’t clean my bum. I. POOOPED. M-AAAAAA-YYYYY…

Cinder: I know a song which will annoy, which will annoy, which will annoy / I know a song which will annoy, which will annoy, which will annoy / I know a song which will annoy…


Cinder: Now do you see the difference?

Jane: Fine. Yes. You were just being normal. Today, your normal is driving me crazy. Go and be unnormal—and, I don’t know, quiet. Repressed.

Flora: Here, Mom, chocolate? And, I think Ender really did poop his pants.

Happy Friday.



P.S. Dear future girlfriends, boyfriends, and perhaps spouses of my children: I’m sorry. Yes, it’s all my fault. And if you think you can fix them—ha. Good luck with that. You’ve just got to love them as they are, you know.

P.P.S.  “What the hell is this? I heard you were this profound, sagacious, over-flowing with widsom mama. I mean, last Tuesday’s post on the “It Gets Easier” Lie was brilliant! That’s why I’m here!” Um. Sorry. I’m only ever insightful and wise on Tuesdays, and then, honestly, not every Tuesday.  On Fridays, we laugh, always. Or at least try not to cry. But if you want serious, have you read my almost-viral (she has delusions of grandeur) Tongues Off My Facebook post? If not, you might want to. Cause it rocks. And if you want hard-core attachment parenting ranting, I refer you to Why Isn’t It Natural? a heart-wrenching wail about why no little about parenting seems to come to us :naturally.”

P.P.P.S. Some things from this week’s blog box I really enjoyed:

Rachel at Tao of Poop reveals she has a past!

Kimberly at All Work And No Play Make Mommy Go Something Something confesses that she’s a snail killer.

Jenn at Something Clever 2.0 tells you how to cure writer’s block.

P.P.P.P.S. And thank you for Tuesday-Wednesday-Thursday’s delusions of viral grandeur. I enjoyed them immensely. Now back to web obscurity…


33 thoughts on ““No, we were just being normal”

  1. This is such a fun post, except for the fact I now have that annoying song in my head.

    Please tell me he didn’t really poop his pants. (I know he did. I just know it.)

  2. Yes, it all sounds painfully familiar, the normal and abnormal. As for Tuesday’s high, I understand how you feel. We can’t be wise all the time, it would be exhausting. For everyone involved. This was a fun post!

  3. Why, thank you! And have I told you yet this week how much I love you and your hilarious children?

  4. I think versatility makes a great blogger, and I love this just as much as when you being brilliant. So. Keep it up.

  5. “Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist…”. Hahaha! These kids are no joke!!!
    And congrats on all the acknowledgement & love you’ve received this week, you totally deserve it!

  6. I have a friend who can’t stand the word moist, now there are too of you! How weird is that!!! Your house is like Isaiah x3. That’s 3 more than I can handle!

  7. Your children’s craziness makes me laugh really hard and marvel at their genius. It could be A LOT worse than that! And…re: the p.p.s…no need, whatsoever, to apologize for this post!! Finally, p.p.p.s….thank you for the holler. I am beyond honored to have my name and post grace a page of this blog. And what a smart idea to do that at the bottom of a post. I like it. Can I steal it?

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