Ender: Ma-ma! Ma-ma! Come to the tub!
Jane: Sweetness, in a few minutes, I’m finishing cleaning the sink… What is this gunk?
Ender: No! Mama come in tub now!
Jane: Dude, what’s the rush?
Ender: I need to pee… and I want to pee on YOU!
Flora: Mom? Why is the oregano in the tin that’s labeled red lentils?
Jane: It’s a long and boring story. The important thing is you found it.
Flora: Where are the red lentils?
Jane: In the ziploc bag labeled brown rice.
Flora: Is that a long and boring story too?
Jane: No, that one’s actually pretty exciting. Want to hear it?
Flora: No, not really.
Flora: Mom? Why is there a flat poop floating in the toilet?
Jane: Um… I guess I forgot to flush the toilet when I last changed Ender.
Flora: But why is the poop flat?
Jane: It’s a long and boring story.
Flora: Oh, I’m not in a rush. Why don’t you tell it to me while I poop?
Jane: Seriously? That’s the story you want to hear?
Flora: You can tell me the rice and lentil tin stories too if you really want to.
Why is she humouring me? What is she plotting?
I love them bums terribly.